Licensed psychotherapist · 10+ years · EMDR · Lifespan Integration · Certified HeartMath trainer · English, German, Hebrew · Online, worldwide
Licensed psychotherapist · 10+ years · EMDR · Lifespan Integration · Certified HeartMath trainer · English, German, Hebrew · Online, worldwide
Who I work with
For people who've done the work, done the reading, possibly done years of therapy — and are still repeating the patterns they can describe in detail.
Book a first session50 minutes, no commitment beyond it
You can name your patterns. You know where they came from. You could probably explain them more clearly than most therapists.
You've had the insight. More than once. Sometimes it even felt like a breakthrough — for about a fortnight.
And then someone criticises your work, or withdraws, or doesn't reply, and you're straight back in it. Watching yourself do the thing you understand perfectly.
At some point the question quietly changes. It stops being why do I do this and becomes why can't I stop doing this when I already know why.
This is not a sign that therapy doesn't work for you. It's also not evidence that you're unusually broken, resistant, or too intellectual for your own good.
Insight is slow, verbal and deliberate. It runs on the parts of you that reflect, weigh and explain — and it requires a certain amount of calm to operate at all.
The reactions causing you trouble are none of those things. They're fast, physiological and automatic. Many were formed early, before language, or under circumstances where reacting quickly mattered far more than reacting accurately.
They don't consult your understanding, because consulting anything would make them slower, and speed was the entire point.
The sequence you keep living
The insight was never in the race.
This is why a decade of excellent, thoughtful talking therapy can leave you articulate and unchanged. The work was real. It was aimed at the wrong system.
This isn't a fringe position, incidentally. A 2019 paper in the Journal of Psychotherapy Integration argues the same thing directly: that physiology has been given too little attention in psychotherapy, that some people simply don't benefit from highly cognitive-verbal methods, and that physiologically oriented approaches expand what's possible with them.
If you've concluded that talking hasn't reached it, you're not being difficult. You're describing something the field has a name for.
This one matters if therapy has helped you before but stopped short.
Patterns like these were solutions once. Vigilance, over-control, self-sufficiency, going quiet — these protected something. A part of you still regards them as necessary, and will keep reinstating them until it has evidence that the danger has passed.
Understanding intellectually that you're safe now is not that evidence. Repeatedly experiencing it is.
Regulate → Integrate → Consolidate. The order matters, and it's the opposite of how most therapy proceeds.
You already have the history. What you don't yet have is the ability to notice, in the moment, that you've shifted into activation or shutdown — and to shift back. Using HeartMath coherence training, that becomes visible on screen and trainable. Most people notice something within a few weeks. After years of insight without change, that matters more than it sounds.
With EMDR or Lifespan Integration, we work with the experiences generating the reaction rather than the account you've built about them. This part usually surprises people who've only done talking therapy. You're not explaining anything. You're processing it — and the change tends to show up as things simply not landing the way they used to.
What the pattern protected, what it cost, what replaces it. This is the part your previous therapy was probably good at — and it works far better once the first two stages have happened.
The self-knowledge you already had starts being usable rather than just accurate.
Not "you'll be transformed." What people in this position usually report:
The space between the trigger and your response widens — from nothing, to a beat, to an actual choice.
Criticism, silence or conflict stops taking the rest of the day. You spend less time re-running conversations at 2am.
Feelings arrive at a size that fits the event, rather than at the size of something older.
You notice the old pattern beginning and can step out of it — not always, but increasingly.
This work asks something of you. It's not a good fit if you're looking for a technique rather than a process, if you're unwilling to practise between sessions, or if you'd prefer to keep the work purely intellectual — which, for people who are very good at thinking, is a genuine temptation and worth naming honestly at the start.
It's also not appropriate if you're in acute crisis or need urgent psychiatric care. In that situation local in-person support is what you need, and I'll tell you so.
What this asks of you
Most commonly, because it addressed understanding rather than the system producing the reaction. Insight is slow and verbal; the responses causing difficulty are fast and physiological, often formed before language. Talking therapy can produce accurate self-knowledge without changing what your body does under pressure — which is why some people finish years of good therapy well-informed and unchanged.
No, and you shouldn't. The understanding you've built is an asset — it means we can skip the mapping stage most people need and go straight to what's missing. Usually that's the regulation and processing work rather than more exploration.
No. Most therapy is organised around insight because for many people insight is enough. If it wasn't enough for you, that's information about what you need, not a judgement about the work you did.
The main difference is sequence and toolset: nervous-system regulation with measurable feedback first, then processing with EMDR or Lifespan Integration, then meaning-making. If your previous therapy was purely conversational, the first two stages will be new.
Regulation changes are usually noticeable within four to eight weeks. Shifts in the deeper patterns take longer and are less linear. I'll give you an honest estimate once I understand what we're working with.
Yes — all of it, including EMDR and HeartMath training. I work with English-speaking clients across Europe and beyond.
Tell me what you've already tried and what didn't shift. I'll tell you honestly whether I think this approach would reach it.
Book a first session